ext_12114 ([identity profile] hesadevil.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] gen_storyteller 2007-02-19 10:19 am (UTC)

I like your use of the present tense. It pulls us into Tori's POV straight away. There's also a symmetry in the construction of the drabble, beginning and ending with the focus on that glass eye.

Nice work.

Post a comment in response:

This account has disabled anonymous posting.
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting